January 16, 2012

State of the Uterus Address

 **NOTE: I'm not actually preggo in this pic. It's the fake belly from a maternity store.**
**I highly suggest this as an activity with preggo friends - it was a good day**

Sigh. Yep, this is conversation that I've had a million times - so here we go again:

You: What are you doing? I thought you'd have babies by now!
Me: Yeah, me too. But I'm not.
You: What?!?! WHYYYY?? Have some BABIES!! Babies are so GREAT!
Me: I know, I generally like babies. But not now, I've got some other stuff on the go. Plus I'm still young!
You: You're not YOUNG! You're TWENTY SEVEN! That's almost THIRTY!
Me: I'm aware of how time works. I will one day... ha ha...
*starts to get awkward*
You:  But you SHOOUULLDD! It will be so FUUN!
Me: Fuck off. No Vacancies in this Uterus!

Okay, so that may be a sliiight exaggeration of the whole thing. But really - people expect us to have babies. And not in a malicious way - I have fully lead them to believe that this is where I'm headed. This is the case I currently present to the world:

Reason I could should would be able to have a Baby:
  1. I have a husband. {Heterosexual monogamy? Double Points!}
  2. I have a house with an additional bedroom. In the 'burbs.
  3. I have a car with 4 doors and some airbags. {Safety first people!}
  4. I am 27 years old - sooooo close to over the hill! My Eggs are OLD!
  5. My friends have babies.
  6. I like babies. {Except on planes - sorry friends with babies!! I don't hate yours! Just other babies on planes. Just the ones that cry. I KNOW it's not your fault, it's a baby... but still. I. Like. To. Sleep.}
  7. I have a job. So does my husband. {Yeay - stability!}
  8. I have a fully functional uterus. {Most people don't really know that, specifically.}
See? I get it why people are all gung-ho about me having babies. I have all the things society tells me I need before I have babies.**  It's the next natural step of life:
And don't get me wrong in all of this, I do love babies and kids.But here's some other things I love right now:
  1. Drinking. Mostly wine. And Champagne. And fancy gin.
  2. Sleeping. In long stretches.Whenever I want.
  3. Eating Sushi!! This is fairly arbitrary, only applies to pregnancy,  not a strong argument.
  4. Traveling recklessly. {Ah, here's a big one.}
  5. Selling everything I own and moving away from my support system. {another solid strike}
  6. Not having babies. {Checkmate my friends, check. mate.}
 But really, I'm not quite ready yet. There were a number of things that Juliano both wanted to do before we officially 'settled down'. One was open a business - check, the others aren't done yet!

When we look at our friends who have kids already, we're overjoyed for them and we LOVE their kids SO MUCH. And we know that we want that eventually - but it just doesn't feel right yet for us.

 My friends who are moms tell me that that all of those things are completely forgotten about when have a baby of your own. A bit tsunami of love comes over you and nothing else matters.
Guess What? I BELIEVE YOU! 
And this is my response:

 But really, this choosing not to have babies business does have some downsides, mostly personal. I was talking to a close friend a few days ago about this - and we were both surprised to discover that we felt the same way about delaying babies. There are a few things about it that affect me:

I'm worried about being an 'old mom'. I know that people have babies at all sorts of ages now, but for some reason - I've always assumed I'd be a 'super-young mom'. As in - babies DONE by 30. This seemed especially possible when I got married at 23! Now at 27 it's still not time. Not a bad thing, just different from what my original plans were, and I have to adjust to that.  

I want Juliano to be a dad. I know that it's cheesy, but I think so many women know that they want to marry someone after seeing them with kids. I know I did. Juliano is SO GREAT with kids - even though his thoughts are exactly on par with mine at the moment, I still feel like I'm potentially 'taking something away' from him - and me!

I do see WHY it's a good idea to wait and WHY it's a good idea to just get on it {ha ha.. no pun intended}. But for now - we delay and do life like we want for a bit. We'll come back for you future mini-deBritos!

** Don't send me cranky email about not needing these thing to have a baby. Yes, you can have a baby without a husband - obviously!! I KNOW!! These are just reason why people think I should have one. Sheesh.

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